Being happy in your relationship

for you to make someone happy you have to be happy. when your man is sad or angry its left to you to make the atmosphere light and happy. the happiness of your relationship should begin with you. after that you then look into the personality of your man . what he likes. what he doesnt like. who he really is. you can make him smile before you even know what is wrong.  before talking him out of that gloom. now this is for a particular situation. in general you have to communicate with your man. let him know how you feel and what you feel. let him know your plans. let him now how your day will be.  he will do same when he sees you doing it. dont be scared or shy to ask him questions. let him talk. listen to him. only when verbal communication is on the way thats when understanding sets in and when you can communicate through a touch or a smile or a lift of the eyebrow. all these little naunces really makes you comfortable and happy. knwing when not to nag . nagging drives a man from his home and from a relationship. instead of talking and talking and more talk.. just let him know that you dont like something and keep quiet. silence is more potent and speaks volumes and makes a man change his ways a little. learning to be expressive. kiss your man at anytime. anyplace. touch him. hug him.  that will make him know that you adore him. and he will worship the ground you walk. a good food is a way to a mans heart. when your man is happy with the food served on his table. he will be happy.  learn to be expressive during love making.. be active.. dont just lie down like a piece of log. learn his body. touch him and pleasure his the way he does to you. dont make lovemaking look like a chore or a duty. your man will be reluctant to leave home and be eager to come back home. be prayerful. always put your liofe and relationship to the god you serve. let happiness the the order of the day in your life and home and relationship.

Who am i married to?

Some people always wonder why dating was fun and marriage has been hell. In fact they don't know who they are married to.

There is only one reason why the person you are married to is Not the person you dated and that reason is PRETENCE
He/she was either pretending or you were too busy falling in love that you never cared about those  bad characters of his/her so you just pretended everything was perfect.
People dont just wake up one morning and change dear. It has either been that way or it has been happening gradually But you didn't notice.

Ive seen couples keep secrets, live double life, constantly lie and pretend.
Why should there be pretence when you are both supposed to walk in agreement and with one mind?. Individually things might be going well But together things can never go well when there is pretence.

Accepted you were both raised differently so you think differently But there is a reason why DATING & COURTING exist 
These are the times you need to know who you are with, become friends and become one.
Marriage is just like dating, only that This time its forever.

The foundation of your marriage is built during the process of dating and whatever foundation you build then is what will stay, whatever character you exhibit then, is what will be accepted all through the marriage and If you were pretending during dating do you think you can pretend all the days of your life?

Most people don't pretend during dating, they show you who they are.
They give the signs that they will cheat, the signs are there that they will beat you, the signs are there that they have fowl tongues, the signs are there that they are lazy But you still choose to pretend and ignore the signs. Now you are married and wondering who the hell am i married to?

People always say marry your best friend But a lot of us ignore this advice.
Your best friend is the one that knows all the crazy stuffs about you.
Your best friend is the one that knows how you love to live your life
Your best friend knows and understand you more than your parents
Your best friend can stand and swear or defend you any day any time because they know What you can and can't do.

Now wouldn't life be easier If the person you are to spend forever with is the best friend?

Some women are scared to talk to their husbands ehnn, mind you there is a difference between fear and respect. When the husband is Not  home they are fun, lively, playful and cheerful But the moment the bell rings and daddy is home she becomes dead silent, all you hear is Yes sir, Yes sir, Yes sir. Are you talking to your father or your husband? No conversation because she is probably scared that she might say something that would upset him. Why would you spend forever with someone you cant be real with?

Some men the moment they get to the gate, they start deleting messages, pictures and etc Not because they are cheating oo probably because they just love chatting and being naughty which is something they would love to do with their wife But their Mrs thinks all those things are nonsense.

There are women whom their spouse beats up on daily basis and the only way they stay happy is by creating an imaginary world where everything is perfect and they have prince charming for a husband. That imaginary world might Not just be on their mind it might be also on social media. They probably have heard this  saying ""you are the product of thoughts" so they need to think positive...  smh face reality, dont pretend its perfect see it as it is. Then ask yourself ""why am i with somebody that i need to pretend with just to be happy?""

For the still single ones, marriage is a beautiful thing, forget all the negativity you have been hearing, fact is all marriage has their ups and downs. Before deciding to settle with someone make sure you leave no stone un turned, ignore no action either when they are angry or happy, be vigilant, even for the pretender once in a while they slip and show their true characters.

:-) :-* stay happy

Let It Go

People will tell you to forgive, forgive, forgive But its Not as easy as it sounds.

I love hammering on the topic of forgiveness because it is essential and important to forgive, that is If you want to be happy.
Holding unto a grudge is painful and ironically the pains are Not for the offender they are for you.
  Its like a burden and as years goes by it gets heavier, you feel more anger and hatred. You deserve to be happy because you are awesome.
Its not your fault that they couldn't see your worth and went ahead to betray you.
They probably don't deserve your forgiveness But you deserve happiness.
Holding unto a grudge is exhausting, the more you hold unto it the more painful it is, you cant be comfortable .
    
   PICTURE THIS
You have been stucked in a horrible traffic for hours and you are so pressed, you need to use the toilet else you might as well go in your pants, your legs are shaky, you are sweating, you cant move, you feel like crying because its that bad, you are even considering leaving your car in the traffic and look for the next available toilet to use. Then luckily the the cars start moving, the jam is clearing up, you cant hold it in or wait till you get to your destination so you quickly park the car and raced into the nearest supermarket to use their toilet, you get in the toilet, hurriedly removed your pants and as you sit on the the potty :-D and with a little push it was like an explosion, bammmm!! your heart is racing, you feel like sleeping, you are so weak and relieved, you dont want to stand up, the shaky legs are gone, the discomfort is gone, its like a heavy load has been lifted off your body and someone just poured cold water on you, oh peace at last halleluyah, Hahahaha.

My point is Grudge are like shits If you don't hit the toilet and push it all out now, you will always be uncomfortable.
If you want to be uncomfortable all your life its your choice But If you want to feel that awesome kind of peace, relief and joy then you know what to do.

Life is beautiful But you cant enjoy life or see the beauty of life when you go about carrying grudge, hurts and anger.
:-* LET IT GO!!!!!

you cant force love

A man that wants to stay with you will stay and nothing can stop him.
But a man that doesn't want to stay nothing can change his mind, If you like turn 360 degree on bed and take his momma's recipes to make delicious meals for him. nothing can change his heart, women make mistakes by trying to do all they can in order for a man to love them, wake up sister you are only hurting yourself. when a man says he doesn't love you believe it dearie and save yourself the troubles.

holy or happy?

1Corinthians 7:2 i quote "since sexual
immorality is occurring each man should have sex
with his wife and each woman with her husband" it
has different translation though But this is the
translation i understood it as "what If MARRIAGE
was meant to make us holy than happy, read that
chapter carefully, and consider this what If God
saw beyond Adams happiness, when you are
married you learn to share, sacrifice, it makes you
less selfish and greedy, you must learn to forgive,
it keeps you away from sexual immorality, what If
MARRIAGE was just part of God's plans to make us
like Christ?? I believe marital problems are just a test of faith that is why i always advice people MARRIAGE is Not a place to rush in
just because you want kids or the society feels
your old enough or your friends and siblings are tying the knot  #its_serious_business..

Live for you

Most people have spent all their life pleasing people and not actually doing what they would love to do. So i begin to wonder how can you ever be happy living someone else`s life??