Who am i married to?

Some people always wonder why dating was fun and marriage has been hell. In fact they don't know who they are married to.

There is only one reason why the person you are married to is Not the person you dated and that reason is PRETENCE
He/she was either pretending or you were too busy falling in love that you never cared about those  bad characters of his/her so you just pretended everything was perfect.
People dont just wake up one morning and change dear. It has either been that way or it has been happening gradually But you didn't notice.

Ive seen couples keep secrets, live double life, constantly lie and pretend.
Why should there be pretence when you are both supposed to walk in agreement and with one mind?. Individually things might be going well But together things can never go well when there is pretence.

Accepted you were both raised differently so you think differently But there is a reason why DATING & COURTING exist 
These are the times you need to know who you are with, become friends and become one.
Marriage is just like dating, only that This time its forever.

The foundation of your marriage is built during the process of dating and whatever foundation you build then is what will stay, whatever character you exhibit then, is what will be accepted all through the marriage and If you were pretending during dating do you think you can pretend all the days of your life?

Most people don't pretend during dating, they show you who they are.
They give the signs that they will cheat, the signs are there that they will beat you, the signs are there that they have fowl tongues, the signs are there that they are lazy But you still choose to pretend and ignore the signs. Now you are married and wondering who the hell am i married to?

People always say marry your best friend But a lot of us ignore this advice.
Your best friend is the one that knows all the crazy stuffs about you.
Your best friend is the one that knows how you love to live your life
Your best friend knows and understand you more than your parents
Your best friend can stand and swear or defend you any day any time because they know What you can and can't do.

Now wouldn't life be easier If the person you are to spend forever with is the best friend?

Some women are scared to talk to their husbands ehnn, mind you there is a difference between fear and respect. When the husband is Not  home they are fun, lively, playful and cheerful But the moment the bell rings and daddy is home she becomes dead silent, all you hear is Yes sir, Yes sir, Yes sir. Are you talking to your father or your husband? No conversation because she is probably scared that she might say something that would upset him. Why would you spend forever with someone you cant be real with?

Some men the moment they get to the gate, they start deleting messages, pictures and etc Not because they are cheating oo probably because they just love chatting and being naughty which is something they would love to do with their wife But their Mrs thinks all those things are nonsense.

There are women whom their spouse beats up on daily basis and the only way they stay happy is by creating an imaginary world where everything is perfect and they have prince charming for a husband. That imaginary world might Not just be on their mind it might be also on social media. They probably have heard this  saying ""you are the product of thoughts" so they need to think positive...  smh face reality, dont pretend its perfect see it as it is. Then ask yourself ""why am i with somebody that i need to pretend with just to be happy?""

For the still single ones, marriage is a beautiful thing, forget all the negativity you have been hearing, fact is all marriage has their ups and downs. Before deciding to settle with someone make sure you leave no stone un turned, ignore no action either when they are angry or happy, be vigilant, even for the pretender once in a while they slip and show their true characters.

:-) :-* stay happy

Should married women work in the co-operate world?

Yes But just Not at the early stage of marriage

This is a sensitive issue and should be handled with total honesty, most people have gotten their homes ruined with This

People are taking feminism the wrong way, when God created Adam He gave him the job of taking care of every other thing outside, naming the animals, working and all But when He created eve it was for one purpose, to be a companion to Adam and take care of him. To take care of everything that happens inside the home.

Dont get me wrong am Not saying because you are married you shouldnt work. What am saying is as a wife and a mother your family needs your attention especially at the early stages, you are the home maker. Your absence can break your home, daddy can travel for 1 month and the kids wont feel it as long as He provides for the home But If mommy goes out for a full 24hour the home will be a mess, i know there are nannies, But a nanny can never fill the space of a mother or a wife.

As a married woman i believe being self employed is the best way to go that way you have time for your family, you come back home whenever you want, But these are things you can never do As a working class woman. You go to work by 7am and close by 6pm, lets Not talk about the traffic, in a terrible traffic you might get home by 9pm and then the kids are already in bed and your husband had probably eaten in a restaurant or the meal the maid prepared.
This is Not the right way to make a home, you cant have a happy home This way, even If you need to work in the co operate world then it should be at a later stage of your marriage where the kids are grown and can handle themselves and you know you have nothing much to worry about, your spouse will understand then that they need to support you. some women might be putting on a charade that being a working class doesn't affect their marriage But i can assure you that is a big lie.

In the co operate world there are lots of competitions, everyone wants to be the best and desperation can get the better part of you to the worst to get a certain position or to win a certain contract Not minding you are married. Some high profile business men dont care If your married, If you want to be the one to get the contract for your company then you gotta be the one to rub his pot belly for at least an hour.

But at the end of the day This is just my opinion so What do you think ?

wake up call for women (tough love )

we gotta stop blaming this men all the time some women are pure idiots, i remember someone posted about her satisfying her beau sexually and yet He likes sex pages and goes around chasing other women, If you think rotating 360degree for a man on bed will keep him then you must be a joke, why would a woman even live with a man that IS Not her husband, father or brother? infact i advise the guys to screw the life out of such stupid girls when you desperately move in with a guy to avoid other babes comin in and giving him the privilege of a husband what were you expecting? are u expecting me to buy data when i already get free data everyday?? .. i am tired of girls crying and playing the victim when they are always the stupid ones. it is Not by force to marry, women know this things are Not right, they know the guy IS a player yet they keep tolerating the crap; we might advise them and give it a week they will still go back to the moron just because they believe men are scarce... The desperate ones have made all women look desperate too that some guys will be giving you conditions for marriage like He IS doing you a favour.. and the single ones that sleeps with married men have given them so much wing that they could ask their wives silly questions like "EVEN IF AM CHEATING ON YOU DOES IT MATTER AFTERALL YOU ARE THE WOMAN THAT IS AT HOME" like seriously? women gotta change. until you stop compromising and start doing the right thing then you ARE always going to be treated bad. Teaching this men how to value women IS Not something only one woman can do, it IS something all women need to decide and stand their ground for because i might decide to remain principled and then my man meets some desperate lady out there willing to take his bullshits then He leaves me. If we dont stop this nonsense Now then it will only get worst, the way men treat women has only gotten worst from generations to generations and If it doesn't stop Now our daughters will suffer a much worst fate. If my post hurts you AM NOT SORRY