Who am i married to?

Some people always wonder why dating was fun and marriage has been hell. In fact they don't know who they are married to.

There is only one reason why the person you are married to is Not the person you dated and that reason is PRETENCE
He/she was either pretending or you were too busy falling in love that you never cared about those  bad characters of his/her so you just pretended everything was perfect.
People dont just wake up one morning and change dear. It has either been that way or it has been happening gradually But you didn't notice.

Ive seen couples keep secrets, live double life, constantly lie and pretend.
Why should there be pretence when you are both supposed to walk in agreement and with one mind?. Individually things might be going well But together things can never go well when there is pretence.

Accepted you were both raised differently so you think differently But there is a reason why DATING & COURTING exist 
These are the times you need to know who you are with, become friends and become one.
Marriage is just like dating, only that This time its forever.

The foundation of your marriage is built during the process of dating and whatever foundation you build then is what will stay, whatever character you exhibit then, is what will be accepted all through the marriage and If you were pretending during dating do you think you can pretend all the days of your life?

Most people don't pretend during dating, they show you who they are.
They give the signs that they will cheat, the signs are there that they will beat you, the signs are there that they have fowl tongues, the signs are there that they are lazy But you still choose to pretend and ignore the signs. Now you are married and wondering who the hell am i married to?

People always say marry your best friend But a lot of us ignore this advice.
Your best friend is the one that knows all the crazy stuffs about you.
Your best friend is the one that knows how you love to live your life
Your best friend knows and understand you more than your parents
Your best friend can stand and swear or defend you any day any time because they know What you can and can't do.

Now wouldn't life be easier If the person you are to spend forever with is the best friend?

Some women are scared to talk to their husbands ehnn, mind you there is a difference between fear and respect. When the husband is Not  home they are fun, lively, playful and cheerful But the moment the bell rings and daddy is home she becomes dead silent, all you hear is Yes sir, Yes sir, Yes sir. Are you talking to your father or your husband? No conversation because she is probably scared that she might say something that would upset him. Why would you spend forever with someone you cant be real with?

Some men the moment they get to the gate, they start deleting messages, pictures and etc Not because they are cheating oo probably because they just love chatting and being naughty which is something they would love to do with their wife But their Mrs thinks all those things are nonsense.

There are women whom their spouse beats up on daily basis and the only way they stay happy is by creating an imaginary world where everything is perfect and they have prince charming for a husband. That imaginary world might Not just be on their mind it might be also on social media. They probably have heard this  saying ""you are the product of thoughts" so they need to think positive...  smh face reality, dont pretend its perfect see it as it is. Then ask yourself ""why am i with somebody that i need to pretend with just to be happy?""

For the still single ones, marriage is a beautiful thing, forget all the negativity you have been hearing, fact is all marriage has their ups and downs. Before deciding to settle with someone make sure you leave no stone un turned, ignore no action either when they are angry or happy, be vigilant, even for the pretender once in a while they slip and show their true characters.

:-) :-* stay happy