My husband talks to me without respect

   Some men are fund of flaunting their male ego on their wife, reasons could be as follows

1) He is the only source of income in the home - some men will always respect their wife  whether she brings food to the table or Not, actually they can even ask their wife to stay home and take care of the kids because that is a full time job. While other men will see her as a lazy woman. He goes to work everyday, he has seen top working class married women that can even bring/win contracts for their husband's But his own wife sits at home all day and do nothing because to this kind of men taking care of the home is as easy as ABC

2) He was raised in a home where his father always disrespect his mother - charity begins at home right? The first school of a child is his home and the first teachers are his parents. I dont need to stretch the explanation because i always talk about how parents should live an exemplary lifestyle. Train up a child in the way He should grow and when He grows he will Not depart from it.

3) He thinks she is of less importance - Where & how some men get their orientation about being husbands always baffle me. Hahahaha they think being a husband is finally an opportunity to boss someone around like their parents has been doing to them all over the years or like their boss does everyday at the office lmao . some could be getting the ideas from their friends, your thinking, "My husband was so kind and respectful in the earlier stage and suddenly He has changed What happened?", well like the saying goes "evil communication corrupts Good manners"

             HUSBANDS

Being the head of a family is about being a leader Not a ruler, You lead in the right part and your wife will follow its Not an opportunity to flex your muscle or male hormones. Now i want You to listen to me and delete all those orientation from your memory that has caused your wife pain for so long.
Being the head of the family is a serious and very important job
It's about protecting your family, You need to be a security officer now You have a family and You  probably should learn some karate because you will need to do a little butt kicking here and there..

Being the head of the family is Not just about bringing the money its also about being physically, emotionally and spiritually present and active, your family needs to know You care, You might think they know already But they dont. 
Your wife is just as important as You are in the family, she is the home maker and without her efforts there probably wouldn't be a home so cherish her

     WIVES
You are thinking how do i get this man to start respecting and valuing me well stop thinking and start acting.
People treat You the way You allow them to treat You, they treat You the way You treat yourself. What is your reaction when He disrespects you, do you sit and cry? Do You yell at him to stop? Well If You do any of these then You should stop and follow this steps because it has worked for several people.

1) figure the reason for his actions

2) Decide What You want to do and things You want to change in your personal life

3) Make a list of What You want to change in that marriage.

4) write everything down so You dont forget any detail.

5) Select a Good day/time to have a conversation with him. It might be on a weekend He wont go to work or on a weekday evening when He is back from work, had his dinner and taken his shower

6) Get a grip on your emotions "today You wont cry or get angry, You are going to sit and have a conversation like a matured adult" If You cannot control yourself and act matured then you cant possibly expect someone to take You seriously.

7) remember dont get angry remain calm. When You are both sitted tell him how You love him and want the best for your home, then calmly say how You feel, let it all out, everything You have written pour it all out.
When You are talking He should quietly listen and when He is talking also listen quietly so there wont be tantrums everywhere, when everyone is talking - no one is talking.

Have a great day

little help, big damage

THE LITTLE HELP THAT MIGHT CAUSE BIG DAMAGES

There are so many little things that can that can cause big damages to your child's future and you wont even know you are doing them harm than good.

DOING YOUR CHILD'S SCHOOL ASSIGNMENT

Most parents are fond of doing their child’s school work, dont worry about your assignment junior go and sleep. I dont know if it is because they are too lazy to teach and direct the child on how to go about it or it is because they believe its stressful for the children, their reasons I dont know and I dont care but it is wrong. Some parents say they are too busy and stressed to do homework with their child so that’s why they just do the work when alone and free to avoid more stress, I understand that excuse but I believe its better to hire a home tutor to help than do it yourself.

In the long run doing your child’s homework just might cause damage in a way you never taught was possible, because this child probably didn’t understand what his teacher explained in class but by the time he wakes up in the morning his assignment is done, he goes to school, submit the paper and gets an A even if he didn’t understand the work. No worries right? After all he is getting A's that’s all that matters.

HE STARTS SEEING THINGS DIFFERENTLY

why should he do his work? If mom or dad cant do it anymore then he can simply slide his pocket money or food to the nerdy kid to do his homework. Life is so much better when you reap without sowing, he can even start paying the nerdy kid in class to help him during exams. He can go through life believing he could just pay someone, sleep, wake up and bammm his work is done. Is this the kind of life you want for your child? You do know that he will not go far in life if he lives his life this way. He might has excellent results but 0 IQ. Who would you blame?

You are probably wondering if it is possible for doing a mere homework for your child cause this much damage, wonder no more because it truly can, train your child the way he should grow and when he grows he will not depart from it. When you train a child in the way of cheating and reaping where he did not sow then that is the way he will grow

Children looks up to us(parents) as their idols, we should set good examples for this children. Teachers in school will try but our kids spends more time at home than in school, dont leave all the academic work to the teachers, you should tutor them if you understand the homework and if you dont understand you call their class teacher to explain or better still send them back to school with the homework undone the next day with a note attached, so the class teacher can explain further for them to understand.

Success is not just about the cars, house and bank accounts, actually to me success is when my child’s teacher calls me to tell me my child is doing a good job at school or when a stranger tells me ''your child is well mannered''. Those are what I call success.

please do not copy my blog contents without permission

Should married women work in the co-operate world?

Yes But just Not at the early stage of marriage

This is a sensitive issue and should be handled with total honesty, most people have gotten their homes ruined with This

People are taking feminism the wrong way, when God created Adam He gave him the job of taking care of every other thing outside, naming the animals, working and all But when He created eve it was for one purpose, to be a companion to Adam and take care of him. To take care of everything that happens inside the home.

Dont get me wrong am Not saying because you are married you shouldnt work. What am saying is as a wife and a mother your family needs your attention especially at the early stages, you are the home maker. Your absence can break your home, daddy can travel for 1 month and the kids wont feel it as long as He provides for the home But If mommy goes out for a full 24hour the home will be a mess, i know there are nannies, But a nanny can never fill the space of a mother or a wife.

As a married woman i believe being self employed is the best way to go that way you have time for your family, you come back home whenever you want, But these are things you can never do As a working class woman. You go to work by 7am and close by 6pm, lets Not talk about the traffic, in a terrible traffic you might get home by 9pm and then the kids are already in bed and your husband had probably eaten in a restaurant or the meal the maid prepared.
This is Not the right way to make a home, you cant have a happy home This way, even If you need to work in the co operate world then it should be at a later stage of your marriage where the kids are grown and can handle themselves and you know you have nothing much to worry about, your spouse will understand then that they need to support you. some women might be putting on a charade that being a working class doesn't affect their marriage But i can assure you that is a big lie.

In the co operate world there are lots of competitions, everyone wants to be the best and desperation can get the better part of you to the worst to get a certain position or to win a certain contract Not minding you are married. Some high profile business men dont care If your married, If you want to be the one to get the contract for your company then you gotta be the one to rub his pot belly for at least an hour.

But at the end of the day This is just my opinion so What do you think ?

Why blame the mistress??

  okay some women are fond of blaming the mistress for the affair instead of directing all the blames to the one that kept playing with the emotion of 2 women.

Most of this mistress dont even have feelings for the husbands all they are concerned about is the money and fun they are having in the relationship
They never walked up to your husband, understand that He did that on his own, He told them intimate things, He booked the hotel rooms, He was the one doing the spending. Accepted she could had said no But who told you she didnt? Do you know how many times He kept pressuring her? Do you kNow the last time she had a man care for her like that?
I know being cheated on hurts especially when you know He did  things He had never done for you to her
Am Not supporting the mistress in any way But If there is anyone that needs to be slapped around then its the man in the middle, He is the one that betrayed you and your marital vows, He could had talked to you If He wasn't feeling okay with the way things were going in the home But no He didn't
Its Not her fault If anything then its you and your husbands fault. It takes 2 to make and break a relationship so If you want to work on your home then work on it, dont waste energy on things that dont matter.

If He is just a boyfriend no need to get angry at the other woman or get into a fight with her, what you both need is to spank him together, He made the same promises to her As He made to you, He probably forwarded the same romantic love messages to her too. She was deceived just like you were, she is hurting just like you are. If there is a problem that need fixing then its the man in the middle

The house wife

the stay at home mom
she is a cook,a doctor, a nanny, a psychologist, a coach, a tutor, a maid what she can do is endless But she does it all and still stay glamorous. If she was getting paid for all her work then she should be earning millions by the year end, she loves unconditionally and sometimes she becomes a watch man who stays up all night to watch her sick child. lets show love to our loving mothers and wives

violent home, violent kids, violent country

Real success is Not about having the most fancied cars, house and all that material things, to me real success are those things money cant buy, things like how proud your kids are of you and brag to their friends even If you are Not there or how your children teachers calls you to tell you how well behaved your kids are .. That is when you need to feel extremely proud of your work. But to raise kids in a way the world can testify that they are great kids, takes  love, unity, hardwork, commitment and determination...
These are things you will never find in a violent home that mummy and daddy swears on each other and exchange blows almost all the time.
This little ones look up to you, whatever you do they copy; you are their mini God: when mommy tells daddy FUCK you and daddy calls mommy a bitch be ready to receive a call from their class teacher the next day because He is so going to use those words.
If you as parents cant settle your differences amicably and live in peace for the sake of these children then you must get separated because VIOLENT HOMES RAISES VIOLENT KIDS and there are no rooms  for more violence in This world